Parents
Tuesday, December 8, 2009 12:58 PM
I'm kind of at war with myself when I think about what my parents say and do.
See, my (yes Phoebe) close-minded tunnel-vision pin-hole camera mother is always making very subjective comments and making them seem like facts. She'd go "Nah, pleat curtains are ugly", or, "Your fringe is ugly because it attracts attention to your nose," and "Get bangs! Cuz I say so", or "You've already been out once or twice with your friends, not enough ah". I don't know how asymmetrical partings attract attention to the middle of your face more than symmetrical blocks of hair. I don't know how she can say pleat curtains are ugly when she used them for our living room. I don't know why she let me get the fringe I have now if she thought it was so ugly. I don't know how she can think friends are so unimportant, when she has been my age before.
The problem for me is that it's difficult to tell when she's actually making a serious factual comment and when she's just giving her opinion, mostly because she takes the latter as the former anyway.
When I went to Penang to stay with my aunt and baby cousins (5, 8 and 9), you can really tell when she wants the best for her children. When I was small, I really didn't care about holding hands while crossing roads, but after observing the mature-minded but sometimes unaware children, I realise how important it really is. Especially with freaky Malaysian traffic!
So while i'm tempted to think my mother wants best for me, I really don't think so. But I can't do or say anything. My mother rules the house. As Anne Frank says (I'm so much like her), children aren't allowed to have opinions around the house.
Sad, isn't it.
Tuesday, December 8, 2009 12:58 PM
I'm kind of at war with myself when I think about what my parents say and do.
See, my (yes Phoebe) close-minded tunnel-vision pin-hole camera mother is always making very subjective comments and making them seem like facts. She'd go "Nah, pleat curtains are ugly", or, "Your fringe is ugly because it attracts attention to your nose," and "Get bangs! Cuz I say so", or "You've already been out once or twice with your friends, not enough ah". I don't know how asymmetrical partings attract attention to the middle of your face more than symmetrical blocks of hair. I don't know how she can say pleat curtains are ugly when she used them for our living room. I don't know why she let me get the fringe I have now if she thought it was so ugly. I don't know how she can think friends are so unimportant, when she has been my age before.
The problem for me is that it's difficult to tell when she's actually making a serious factual comment and when she's just giving her opinion, mostly because she takes the latter as the former anyway.
When I went to Penang to stay with my aunt and baby cousins (5, 8 and 9), you can really tell when she wants the best for her children. When I was small, I really didn't care about holding hands while crossing roads, but after observing the mature-minded but sometimes unaware children, I realise how important it really is. Especially with freaky Malaysian traffic!
So while i'm tempted to think my mother wants best for me, I really don't think so. But I can't do or say anything. My mother rules the house. As Anne Frank says (I'm so much like her), children aren't allowed to have opinions around the house.
Sad, isn't it.
Labels: Discussion